All the way from Kiss FM radio, DJs Ricky Haywood and Melvin Odoom proudly present TV’s latest gormless game show Bang On The Money.

In terms of smash hit potential, this forgettable offering is about as bang on the money as Vernon Kay’s car crash catastrophe Drive.

In fairness, it’s nowhere near as bad as that. What is? And, while Ant & Dec won’t be losing too much sleep, Ricky and Melvin are perfectly pleasant presenters.

But the trouble with ITV’s hopelessly nondescript programme is it’s like daytime telly dross swimming out of its depth. Blue neon mediocrity more suited to weekday afternoons than Saturday night.

Genial duo Rick and Melv might be ready for prime time. But this dreary competition between teams of friends definitely isn’t.

Despite deafening oohing and ah-ing from the allegedly excited studio audience, the crass contest is as confusing as it is complicated. Three Two One without the laughs.

As the hosts take each other on in various banal challenges (eg. who can run faster in a chicken suit) the players predict who’ll win.

Then they have to nominate exactly what they’ll score in a succession of not very interesting showdowns. And somehow or other the lucky finalists end up trying to scoop the £40,000 top prize.

Packed with unexciting non-celebrities, bland and boring BOTM has got couldn’t care less written all over it. Widespread apathy guaranteed. Classic tellyfilla.

But back to Melvin and his burning question: “Who would say no to us?” ITV, when you ask to make a second series.